A Blog, Delivered With Sinus.

I'm currently blogging from Port Dickson, a few nights after I was able to go online in the business centre, secretly playing Texas HoldEm Poker on Facetube.

It has been fun.

But besides that, I'm just hibernating from the 24 days that passed a few days ago during my period in Bausch K at Gurney Plaza. I did learn a few things along the way, so it was kind of cool.

For the moment, I'm still in Port Dickson until further notice. I'm not sure what's going on at the moment as everybody's suffering from a communication breakdown.

But I'm doing just fine. And sooner than you'll expect, I'll be flying off to Australia to further my degree.











Just like my KL stint in 2007, I'll miss you all, and because of KL, I made more friends, so I'll be missing 2 states of friends. Lol.

You all know it best that I'll be fine there in Australia.

No pictures up yet, but my next batch of Lomography is going to be settled soon, so keep your eyes out.

I'm not even sure if the pictures are going to turn out good. Haha.











Till then, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

I Have Only One Thing To Say.

This Christmas is going to be a shitty one.

Let them celebrate it amongst themselves.

I don't really bother.

I'll spend it with myself, and music.

And if they ever bitch, I'll make sure that they have to speak the words I want to hear.

If not, I won't even fucking bother.











Is there a way how you can disown yourself from your family?

201209

This fine day would mark the greatest day for Ocean of Fire, and its lead guitarist, Kelvyn Yeang.

Today was the day they did their album launching in a place where not many would expect to mark their historical event; at Hard Rock Cafe itself.

Not the hotel, but the cafe.

Familiar faces were there, and Ocean of Fire performed their album's songs to ensure that their crowd would get a worthy RM20 of an album.

Besides that, they had Ray Rozell, Dasha Logan, and Kelvyn's schoolmate (his father taught him blues, etc. My bad for fogetting the name)

On top of it all, Ocean of Fire did their final song to end the whole showcase, but with a bang.

A very surprising one, indeed.

Ocean of Fire did a song entitled, "I've Found You", which is still in composition, and still imperfect in any way possible, but it creates a man as he is. Nobody is perfect, after all, and Kelvyn admits that.

Just about on the 5th or 6th minute later, Kelvyn got off stage, took the microphone, kneeled down to his long-love, Marion Yeoh, and proposed for her hand in marriage.

And this is my first time witnessing my friend proposing for an engagement.

I was nearly in tears, seriously. But I can never be any more happier for the both of them. And on top of it all, Ocean of Fire had worked their way up so far, and they finally did an album launch.

Many bands went through a lot of recession stages, but Ocean of Fire, like little bands, still kept it strong.

And today, marks their day in just the beginning of 2010.

I wish them all the best in their future undertakings, and all the best to Kelvyn in his relationship's level.

This is so cool!

Congratulations to Marion Yeoh and Kelvyn Yeang.











Besides that, I met up with 2 of my ex-primary schoolmates which I've seen only in Standard 6.

So cools wan today.











Well, my birdies. I'll see you all soon whenever I see you all.

Today is such a cool day.

Although..

.. A customer came up to me and saw the whole place in a mess, the preparation for me to shut the whole kiosk down when my boss is not around.

"I'm sorry. But are you all closing..?"

Me: "..."

Thoughts: ".. Star Skills; Just say "Yes"!"

Me: "... Yup. We're still opened. You looking for the ring you spotted a few days ago?"

Opened the till, blasted in the opening fund, again.

Served the first and the last customer for the day.

Then I closed the kiosk.

Although only a small profit was earned today, I felt frustrated. Nobody's around, nobody even bothered to look around, and listen to what we have to say about the products we're selling.

(I can't say, I'm selling, because it's not my company.)

Unfortunately, results are bad, and I'm suffering from its downfall with the absence of my superior.

He is planning to sacrifice himself due to the downfall, and also cutting as much cost as possible. Firstly, with the labour cost due to the sales not being able to cover back.

So, one more week to go in this odd experience.

Then my holiday begins.. *phew*











Although little, but now I understand how my ex-Store Managers mumble about costs, CoGS and not being to achieve sales. Of course, when we work under them as baristas, we didn't really care. But imagine if you were to be in their shoes, reporting to the District Managers. That's when the fireworks will begin.

Also, although it's been a tiring day, and tomorrow will be another one, like a stressful day at my previous working place..

.. I'll sit down, play the guitar until everything seems right again.











Now, that's what you call passion.

Hi Guys.

It's been a while since I last blogged.

I haven't found the appropriate mood to blog about my overall Starbucks Experience, or my Green/Black Apron story. All put to good rest. One day, maybe, I shall write about it if I'm in the mood.

For the moment, if you all are interested in jewelry being presents, please do drop by at Gurney Plaza. I'm working under Bausch K until the 24th, and we have quite a wide range of Stainless Steel Jewelry.

Advantages?

If you were to be robbed off your jewelry, you will be the one laughing because the thief doesn't realise he just stole a high-quality fork.

Or teaspoon, if it were to be a small plain ring.

I'm participating in the fair from the 1st December to the 24th December.

Please do pop by to support.











Besides advertising, I am also facing a huge headache with this new job of mine, because not many have heard of stainless steel jewelry.

One day, I'll blog about it.

But for the moment, I need my sleep.

Today,

I laughed so hard until I nearly lost my voice.

And also, I laughed so hard until my asthma kicked in.

I also laughed very hard because of poker.

And to top it all, today marks my last day in Starbucks.

Wheee?











There goes my green and black apron journey. I wanted to blog about it, but I lost the mood somewhere. So what's the point? Where is that passion?

Passion Questioned.

I was wondering these few days, what my passion is all about?

I was afraid that I put my work in first place when it comes to passion.

About coffee, and wanted to go for tea.

But I was wrong.

I always thought that I was the Starbucks fanatic thing. Being able to create the third place for customers I've served. Nothing could take passion away from learning more about coffee.

But, going to leave the company - it's not going to feel that bad.

Today, they had the Penang Jazz Festival presentation at Starbucks New World Park during my shift, and it was awesome.

Of course, it had to be awesome. Besides Ocean of Fire playing, the veterans were either playing, or just watching good Jazz music.

And that's when it swept me off my feet.

Listening to them play, did not demotivate me in what I wanted to do most. That was to rip the guitar off someone else's shoulders and start playing along.

I enjoyed the various sort of music being performed.

And that's where my passion had always lied in.

Even if I were to study music.











So. What's next?

Simple; more guitar. :)

I Was Happy!

Well, the keyword is was .. So what happened?

I slept at 1am-ish.

But woke up at 4am.

And I've been awake ever since.











Sigh.

My Bitten Lips.

Ignore the title.

I have no idea what to post.

I woke up today, like the undead.

Had my bath, had lunch, came home, took a nap, had my bath, went to work, had supper with friends, and came home.

In between were thoughts of you smiling.

In between were thoughts of you crying.

In between were thoughts of you being in pain.

In between, I had crippled my heart and yours.











But when you're down, I'll still have to carry you on my back.

Even if you don't want it, but it satisfies my needs.

You're missed.

Very dearly.











I'm sorry.

And Another Note.

I just saw pictures of myself taken with my friends of different groups.

I had this urge to grab the picture, and tear every one of myself out from the picture.

And when I put it back.

They'd still smile.











They'd still smile.

I've come home to nobody.

I Came Home Today.

Let me blog.

My blog.

My life.

My thoughts.

*thinks back..*

I was outside of my place, at the garden opposite where I park the bike. Sitting on the stone table and chair, where I once played in the playground when I was young. Before it was broken, now overrun by a bunch of potted plants. And some of them overgrew until it grew roots on the ground.

As I stood up, I felt empty.

Only pain, but emptiness.

As I walked towards the step, past the bike that gave me freedom for the past weeks; allowing me to do the things that I was never able to do when I was younger. When the family was home. When my brother was home. When my mum would shout at the both of us.

Where I would shut up and let her say what she wants.

But because I stood up, and walked on, with chains and bangles on my ankles, I felt gravity pulling me down to the earth.

I fight for my right.

But why does fighting for my right feels wrong?

The more I walk, the more pain being inflicted.

I began to choke. Not forgiving myself for who I've become. My tear glands gave way. But being me, what are tears?

I opened the door, I came home to..

... Nobody.

This used to be the best feeling that I could ever feel. So much peace. Nobody fighting against each other. I don't see my brother shouting towards my mum. Or my mum shouting towards my dad. Or myself shouting towards my mum and back at me.

I just came home to nobody.

I closed the door, and the ultimate feeling closed down upon me.

Unknown sadness.

Something I never experienced before. The sort of thing that you would suggest me to go to a psycologist.

It gets lonely sometimes. And today, I didn't get to say goodbye. My mum left. And I'm not going to see her for quite a bit.

I am sad that I can't sleep well everyday, resulting to me staying up till 7am or 10am in the morning, then getting sleep after that.

My responsibilities grew bigger and bigger. My smiles, laughs and jokes at work are just my acting tools to allow me to shadow myself from what I really feel.

When I walked into the room. I saw the messiest place in the world. This is my room. But it was not the place on how I grew up.

So, I sat down on my bed. Grabbed my guitar, and played the tunes that didn't sound like music although they're theorically right.

I came home to nobody.

I played the guitar, without a soul.

I wanted to see myself, but I never bothered to look at the mirror. I just walked past it. I didn't even bother to see myself.

I don't love myself.

I don't know love.

I don't know who I'm coming home to.

I do not acknowledge my father's criticisms, advises or praise. I used to be proud, but take note of the key word - used to be.

Insignificant.

Why?

I have no idea what my goals are. Who am I going to be when I'm 30. What am I going to be doing when I'm 30. Where I'll be..

.. Have I ever thought about it? Yeah. But I put the thoughts aside because I don't even bother.

It took me very quickly to realise two things.

1) I've completely failed at being myself.
2) I've screwed up someone else's life, but not my own.

My passion and curiousity for things begun to die. My coffee knowledge, my guitar theories, quick mathematical calculations, and my passion towards my mother tongue.











Very dishonourable. And everybody still hangs onto who I am.

Why?











Some people say that it's not worth it, and I don't deserve this. But if I've screwed up someone else's life really good, I've disgraced my own character. Yet, I'm better off as a loner.

If I were to be in a battlefield, and when the general gives the order to commence on the war, I'd be the first one who takes the opposing country's first blood before the rest.

And before I fall, and be forgotten.




I'm sorry.

Not because of what I've done.

But for who I've been. And who I am.

I can understand most of you can't forgive me.

It's okay.

I don't mind.

Death is just another phase of life.

So to who reads this sooner or later, make full use of what you have left in your life.

You may be a loser, an emo person, a happy person, or successful person.

Eventually, you will find your happiness.

An eternal one.

I lost mine.

And there's nothing I can do.











"To do music, you have to really sacrifice everything you've got."

And I just might.

Forgive me.

December approaches.

Merry Christmas, everyone. Have a white one.

Mine will be like any other ordinary day. Celebrations can always be postponed.

Even birthdays.

21.

Pfft.











Thank you to those who made my life worth living.

"Soon, I'll be free as a bird. And this bird, you cannot change."

But hey. You all would be happy soon, right?

Soon, there'll be one person less to worry about. Doesn't that sound good?

Hmmm.

It's pretty amazing how a simple song sounds so nice only because of the techniques being used. And the right notes being used at the same time.

I nearly sprained my wrist doing the last solo bit.

I SAY IT IZ AWEZOMES.

On Your Grave, I Shall Mourn.

The times you spoke,
The times you saw.
Do you see what I am?
Or assumption's at hand.
The anger released,
The times you knew.
Will you be sorry?
Or the words won't mean a thing?

On your grave, I shall mourn.
Only if I feel like it.
A demotivated child,
Who does not see the point.

An engravement done by him,
Would be the love set for eternity.
An engravement done by him,
Would be tempted to break the tombstone.
The afterlife will a painful one,
The afterlife will be torturous.
But since the day he was born,
He was in hell already.

On your grave, I shall mourn.
Only if I feel like it.
A demotivated child,
Who does not see the point.

On Dreams, On Clouds.

Huhuhu..

You're there.

I'm here.

It may be distant, but when I hear your voice over the phone.

I cry.

I still care.

And I can't stop myself even if I wanted to.











Sleep well.

I miss you dearly.

A Late Night Out.

Like usual, I spent it in the company of the great Kelvyn Yeang. Doing his music, and stuff. Met a couple of his music mates as well.

But first thing's first. To some, you know what this is. To many, this is the Lomography Fisheye 2. It takes shots and exposes it onto the negative on film (!!!!), so lomography is tougher than you think, honestly. Even an SLR allows you to see the exposure balance if it were to be 0, +2 or -2. This has nothing.

Anyways, meet the new addition to the family.

Which my mum doesn't know how to use as well because it has more than 2 buttons.



It has its pros and cons in its own unique way. Truly an interesting experience.

I whipped out my camera later on at Kelvyn's studio to take some shots to see if I could warm up my photography skills.

Sadly, it needs to be warmed up. And I have to tear my decisions in either being a musician, or a photographer.

No such thing as both.





Oh well.

Lalalala.

Fish's Eye of View.

So, the tools of the trade would be a Canon PowerShot SX10IS, or a Lomograph Fisheye 2.

:D

Women Drivers Are..

.. Very responsible. They are the species that tell the male species to stop speeding, drifting, or racing on the roads or they would not get the chance to make babies with them.

The male species would be very tame after a good shout by the female species.

But the responsible women drivers are those who already passed their 2 years of P driving.

Today, I nearly knocked into a stationary Peogeot 206. As a biker, I'm not that clumsy, so it's entirely on this fucked up bitch's fault. It's already 3am in the morning, and she thinks she's trying to hit the Nurburgring under 10 minutes in her crap French car.

Problem is, she sped out of the corner in a very unreasonable distance, and she braked.

Idiots like these, would just either move on, or just reverse. You don't stop in the middle of the road and hesistate.

Because of her "Oh, I'm in a rush home because I was busy having sex with my big-cock-tearing-vagina boyfriend and my parents are wondering at home if I'm pregnant yet" attitude, she sped, then she stopped, causing me to nearly knock into her, and not giving me allowance to swirve either left or right.

What a bitch.

She then overtook me, which I allowed her to, to get a good loook of her profile and lifestyle. Your middle aged bitch. Driving a car that her parents got her (Not her parents', obviously), has a P sticker, pretty long hair, but bundled because it's at night, dyed slightly light brown.

So in other words, I nearly banged into a typical Chinese bimbohead who can't drive for nuts, and I hope that she gets raped one fine day have be cursed. I hope that a Hummer H1 would cure my misery by crashing into her, and constantly stomping on the gas pedal while thinking it's the brake.

Also, I hope that her tyres would be punctured because she's going to piss off a lot of people very soon.

In fact, I hope she dies very soon. Since it's some Chinese belief that you sneeze if someone was talking bad about you. I'm talking bad about this bitch, driving that Peogeot 206, and I hope when she sneezes, she would be travelling 140kmph into a 10 year old tree.

No. A lamp post would do good.

No. I'm suggesting, she'll crash into the brick wall of a school.

Or no, let her bang into a 289 year old tree.

Or can she just ram into the tree, then break it, then crash into the lamp post, but breaking it, then crashing into the brick wall of school.

Then when she's semi-conscious, she'll find out that she's going it doggy style with a dog.











This is a warning. If I see you on the roads again, you'd better fork out a lot of money for dent and paint repairs if I were to be on the bike. Obviously, I can't kick you when I'm driving in the Camry. So I'll go mobile, bitch.

I Would Love To Update, But..

Something funny just happened.

Problem is, it'd be kind of vague for me to blog about it.

Neverthless, I'm going to make full use of my off day tomorrow (Hopefully) and see what nonsense I can come up with. Heh.

Heeee.

And it's raining like hell at the moment. Like, wtf.

Asleep..?

Heee.

You're half asleep.

Well.

I've got something to share with all of you.

@ http://antu0in0art0motion.blogspot.com/2009/10/untitledwishing-best-of-happiness.html

I LIKE THIS.

Manyak comel and sweet and cute and comel.

Huhuhuh..hello mr. gorilla..

Remembering..

.. How people came into your life. You got to know them, played with them, talked to them, went out with them, and so many other things.

Now, it may be 4 years away from the last date you remembered. You see them as they were. But the personality you once knew ceased to exist.

Eventually, they are still around. But you don't play with them, don't talk to them, don't go out with them, and do so many other things.

It's just the cyberspace, and a hi-bye sort of thing.

No matter how real things may be, it's sad to know that the people are there, just standing by the entrance of the door in your life. Sooner or later, they won't be standing there. They'll be gone.

Gone.











But thank goodness, some people understand such issues, and they still stay the same. These people are simply amazing, even if they don't have the best of financial situations.

Life's brilliant, isn't it?

Another For That Inspiration.

You'll never guess what I JUST got.

Okay, it's pretty obvious, but for those who doesn't know just yet, Ocean of Fire's latest album - entitled "Destination" is out.

I got it through Kelvyn Yeang thanks to a planned Left 4 Dead / DoTA session by Choo Shen Way.

And I couldn't stop noticing the album cover, because the previous released album had all sorts of things in it that carries how Kelvyn would design something.

I'm not sure what you call that sort of designing, but it's that sort of a design.

For a change, they did this:



Which is awesome.

Which is an understatement because Kelvyn said that this inlay was done via Corel Paintdraw (I forgot the name, but hell, I remember using it when my mum's office computers were running on Windows 3.II!!) with mouseclicks. Mad respect to the one who did the cover; Damien Wu.

Also, the inlay looks like as if Kelvyn brought out his inner child and scribbled all over the descriptions of each track. I had a good laugh by reading it.

Now, with this warm theme-based cover, which is a new look for the band, would it carry a different sound for their composition as well?

The answer is going to be straightforward. It's a yes.

And I'm happy listening to this album if I were to compare it to their previous project, which was also a good attempt - An Instrumental Rockfunkjazzynotsometal Project. But like wine, as they age, they produce a better taste, flavour, and ideas for music.

This album consists of a total fo 12 tracks, which I also think is averagly priced for a CD.

I'm listening to the 4th track - There's a Heaven Above Us, which still has my ears on its edge, as I could've sworn that I heard something flashy done by tapping all sort of notes on the guitar fretboard. This 4th track of the album, starts with a Fusion-based genre, but gets everywhere after quite a bit.

I remember watching Ocean of Fire during my young-guitar age days, and they were just being..themselves.

Now, it's 2009 (or 2010 as stated on the album), they still sound like themselves. You'll know Jonathan Scully is bashing every single thing he sees on the drum kit, Jonathan Chen poppin' and slappin' to the bass, Chiat doing the harmonies and supportive chords to Kelvyn where he'll be running his fingers all over the fret board. If he could successfully used his 8 fingers and 2 thumbs to tap on the fretboard, I'm sure he would've done such possibilities to perfect it.

As I'm writing this, I must say that after 8 years, they have made great progress together as a band, searching for a mind-blowing, ear-orgasmic brilliant sound to suit the theme of songs that they're writing to accompany the titles of the songs.

As some of you know, idolised shred music would be based on guitars with sustain bummed out to the maximum, feedback during pauses of the song, and there'll be a lot of fanciful finger works. But this all stopped when the 6th track, Kawan-Kawan, kicked in. Soothing rhythm lines, low-sustained lead guitars, and plenty of feel. I wouldn't say that Kelvyn did everything by himself, because I believe that good sound is achieved by the support that he has in the music - the drums doing the right rhythm, the rhythm guitarist doing the right chord and strumming pattern, with plenty of soulful basslines.

It's a perfect mix of everything. Something to relax to, something to feel, and to go on a wonderful destination with.

I can see myself driving on the highway with this album being played in the CD player.

I am still surprised with how they have matured in terms of ideas, and playing styles. It's a great all-rounder sort of album instead of your usual shred album.

And as stated in the album; "Having no guidelines or a standardised approach to writing music occasionally gives OOF a rather sporadic sound." Written to, would be; "In some songs, the solos are prewritten. On others, we improvised. And sometimes, on inspiration-fuelled moment flashed through the glitches, and mistakes evolved into new, exciting ideas".

Which I find truly unique. Did you know that there was one part of the guitar solo in Mr. Big's "To Be With You" was done because it was a mistake? Because it being a mistake, it gave the solo a much more bigger personality and a different feel instead of the usual predictable stuff.





I must say that this is entirely a different approach done by these 4 great lads. This time, they invested a little bit more in achieving such tone quality, so they're providing you proper value for your RM25. With great help from JD in mixing the songs, and the almighty Nick Lee for doing the album mastering, they have captured the oddest harmony of what they love singing through their instruments.

Also, extra credit goes out to those who has helped them in doing the album, such as:
Graphic layout: Tsu Lim and Schizzow.
Photography: Jeannie Lee & Shankar Laxminarayanan








And I still think that whoever did the album cover is one brilliant genius. Corel Paintdraw.. With a mouse? That's like shredding the guitar with your teeth. Not picking; but shredding. With your teeth.

Overall, I am in love with music by listening to these great musicians evolving and giving in a lot of matured tone and ideas.

Great job, guys!

By reading the inlay, it'll teach me to be a proper musician and to be a better person to be conscious of what's around us; accepting different music when music is truly a beautiful language to sing, to write, and to play.

Ooh! Seashell Song's the next item on my playlist! Heee.






Edit: My God, they gave it a bloody facelift!!

It Feels Like..

.. Shit.

You come home, to the place you call home, and you face everything that a home does not define.

I feel very unwelcomed.

Very, very unwelcomed..

And the only thing I can do is nothing.

Just sigh, and get along, I guess.

Ain't nothing we can do, right?

There's always music.

So I'll just hide away in this shell. Hopefully it has good THX sound system, and a shitload of Dream Theater. I'll survive.

HARO.

I THINK I AM GOING OUT OF MY MIND.

YOU'RE SLEEPING.

AND GUESS WHAT.

I miss you.

Meow?

Brrr...

And tomorrow shall be my ..first day!

How My Life Got Wasted.

It's one of these situations, see.

I say, listen to your mother to waste precious moments of your life.

Think I'm wrong? Fine. Don't complain your mum never nags at you for no reason then.

"Jean Louis!"
"What." (Not even bothering to ask what's really up.)
"Come here!"

*Walks into the room*

As much as I'm not trying to make this comical, but I'm disgraced with how accents get into the family without the offsprings even bothering to pick it up.

But, here goes anyway. I wish I had my ear plugs.

"You see the curtains there har. The wires are usually blocking it."

Her being non-specific in her life, the wires - in relation to the telephone wires that we had to make "neat" upon her command. So my brother hooked the whole thing above the curtain railings so it wouldn't slither all over the floor.

And there I was. Waiting for her to suggest what I should do.

"So har, what we can do har, is to.. Hmmm.."

Me: "....?"

As she thought of something to do and then did something else, I went back into the room and lied down on my bed, trying to get rid of my stupid sinus caused by that girl.

Of course, when I atteneded to her, I happily sneezed in her face, with all sorts of dust, mucus, and nostril productivity, to show that you should not expose me to places that contains a high degree of dust. Not even Palm Springs had that much of dust.

Talk about short attention span. But at least her attention span lasted longer than mine. Because I lost mine at this point of her speech:

"You see the curtains there har. The wires are usually blocking it."

Surprisingly, I never heard antyhing after that.

Lesson learnt.

When my mother calls, I should not respond unless if I see the house on fire. But the house being on fire depends if she's burning anything in the first place.

Oh yeah. For a person who talks about recycling shit in this shithole, I thought she was a green person, also being what I hate - an environmentalist. As green as Jeremy Clarkson pointing to a green Lamborghini Murcielago, stating that it is, literally, a green car; I found her burning a shitload of dried palm tree leaves.

Ever heard of the rubbish bin, by the way?

That's what I would do. Get the people who shits on the environment via dumpsters to do the job. I did my part, but I couldn't care less if they did theirs.

Going green like, using RON95 petrol compared to RON97. Bold decision, but consider our transportation investment. It'll cost us more to replace a fucked up engine than for us to pollute the world with rich petrol.

On the other hand, I couldn't care less.

Save the earth? The Earth is going to die sooner or later. Why not do something noble? Like feed the hungry. At least that'll bring up a new generation to fuck up the world even more because the world fucked them up before anybody thought of doing anything to them.






I don't know if you noticed the Chinanese slang that goes around in the house, but that har har har issue is leading her to be a cartoon character very soon.

I'm not kidding.



Wow. By the way, Maddox updated himself, and I wasn't aware. That sucked.

And It Is True;

There are several reasons why an individual would want to run away from certain issues which are impossible to tolerate or cope with.

There are several reasons why an individual thinks of suicide before anything else under peer pressure.

There are also several reasons why an individual pays attention to the subject before assumptions.

But this individual is constantly reminded why he decided to disappear for a more than a year.

Unfortunately, as expected, things never changed.

There is a difference between an expectation, and assumption.

I expected, not assumed.

It gives me more reasons to find to get out of this shithole once again.

Paradigm Shift.

Only this place makes me agree that there is no point mourning over the death of another member in the family.

Let alone, my family. The others have a right.







Jesus fuckin' Christ.

A Big Ouch.

I'm finally able to go online with my new wireless router at home.

It's MINE, by the way.

So what happened to the old one?

Simple. I don't know what happened, but both the wireless router and the old modem got fried, so I decided to have a few good rounds of sex with it.

Then bought a new modem/router through my mum's technician.

I sense I'm going broke very soon. Yay.

And..and..and..

it sucks not being able to go online. I just found out that my modem at home got fried..curently looking for a new one via suppliers..

and..

I miss u.. it's d first day of oct, and I understand how hectic things can get..

or maybe I did something wrong.

me misses u.

let the whole world know..that a half hearted tikus silently weeps with his guitar..

now..how the fck do u post blogs via handheld devices? blehhh.

Just To Know.

Every time I switch on my laptop, besides to let it run to scan for viruses and playing music so I won't entirely go out of my mind, I look at my desktop picture.

That warm and agressive sunset.

Taken where, with who..?

.. ;(

Yay, Penang!

First of all, I would like to thank Telekom Malaysia for such shitty services in conjunction with their sub-company, StreamyX. Without notification, the superb internet that lies in my household gets jammed, and a little bit fucked up.

Therefore, causing me to finish up The Lost Symbol 2 times faster than ever and being bored at home at a constant rotting rate.

Besides that, I've been flooded with several important emails, also failing to update my family in what's going on is a very big crucial issue.

What jackasses.

Besides that, the house is in a terrible condition. I've been staying home over late nights, getting the same ol' supper, and clearing out bits by bits. I'm soon going to throw away most of my belongings in my cupboard to ensure there's enough space for..at least, something.

Grrrr.

What the hell.

And now that my internet is busted, I'm sitting by the roadside outside of my friend's house, hoping that the family doesn't find out I'm leeching off their connection until they find out themselves. LOL.

I'm still alive and well ;)

'Till then, I'll see ya all soon..











ME MISS YOU, SAYANGKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUu ;(

My 1st Day of Raya.

Today is the first day of Raya, so meaning I probably have something interesting to share.

I couldn't sleep, to The Lost Symbol kept me up till 4am.

.. And no; Like Chinese New Year this year, I did nothing but work, and relax.

In a way. Except that this is Raya, so I had things coming my way unexpectedly.

After I finished my shift, I went home with another partner of mine who stays in the heart of Kota Damansara. Where I stay would be the fringe of it.

So I did my laundry as scheduled today.

2 hours later, at 10pm, where everybody gets something to eat at probably a hawkers' stall, or a Mamak's stall.

I went downstairs where I would usually munch on something, but hey. Not all people are workoholics. I totally forgot that it's Raya today, and the Mamaks are Muslims as well.

So guess what.

I had to go for Plan B; McDs delivery (where I already had it for lunch and it sickens me.) and guess what:

Me: "Hello? I would like to place a delivery."
Operator: "Mr John? Your address is .. in Damansara?"
Me: "Uh.. Yeah."
Operator: "I'm so sorry sir, but there are overlapping orders from Damansara. I'm unable to place an order at the moment."
Me: "...?"

So.... I had to resort the one thing that I might get for free, if only the delivery comes in more than 30 minutes:


Domino's Pizza. That being accompanied by wonderful things like this bookstand/laptop cooler I just bought @ RM69


Which holds the somewhat Satanic bible that's written by one hell of a brilliant man, Dan Brown.




And if there were to be any issues faced after the delivery, I shall resort to..


And I'm supposed to be saving up for.. I don't know what, but I'm not supposed to spend anything on anything. Sadly, with this event here, I think it's as equilvalent as spending on nice shirts and a good shopping session.










PS. Only 1 Starbucks Berries Cheese Mooncake, Maggi Cup were harmed and consumed during the panic of my starvation.

First Day of Raya.

The first day of Raya went well, but not as well up to my expectations. Doesn't matter anyway.

Also, I just finished my 2nd last shift in Starbucks Ikano. My final shift would be tomorrow, then I have to report in @ Starbucks New World Park next Sunday.

The people here are great. Just that when the time calls you to go home, you have to go home.

I'm not going home because home calls me, but I have some stuff and settlement issues to settle over there, then I'm out of Malaysia.

I'm going to miss being a Starbucks barista. It's all about the Green Apron that creates the Starbucks Experience.

At least I'm leaving in a good manner.

I guess.

Kanye West Rhymes With..

.. Being a jackass.

I've never seen such arrogance from an unprofessional musician who has childish battles.

I respected him as a producer, and disrespected Akon utterly for what he did to that little girl on stage.

But hey, tides changes on the weather.

One thing I hate is whenever a musician can't keep his trap fuckin' shut and comparing one artist to another.

Little does he know, not everything revolve around R&B and them rap music. There's other genres in the world which I believe that he would be severed for if he were to compare Dream Theater's production and ideas to Beyonce.

I heard it's Anti-Kanye today.

I hope it goes on.

Motherfucker.

And I don't know who's Taylor Swift is, but God knows that we all pity her.

It's like getting raped in public.

What a jackass.

So..

......

So many things going through my head. But then again, I've settled one of them - the Coffee & Tea Authority certification. I'm not certified yet, but (hopefully) soon. I don't know if I'm able to carry the qualities in passing that certification as it is our basic test that they just introduced (??).

Plus the previous 2 weeks have been very very horrid towards me. No internet connection and chronic fever. It's like an on/off switch, and I'm not the one flipping it.

It's what I eat.

Pretty much scary due to the H1N1 issue, but I wasn't bothered completely by it. Heh.

So I've got a headache now. How?

THUG2, that's what! Wheeee..!

That Tune In My Head..

... Hum... Hum.... Hum..... That silenced medley..

No More.

Minor Updates.

Very minor ones, that's for sure.

Today, I'm going to transfer the final batch of items that I do not use anymore (I hope) from my place in PJ. After that, I'm going to watch Up. Cute movie, really. This is probably the first time that Pixar managed to catch my eye regarding a movie with a cartoon-ic storyline.

I've got a question though. Why is Bolt and Angels and Demons still out and Public Enemies is already cleared from the cinemas listing?

Thanks to them being retarded, I will officially support pirated products by buying a DVD, or not support piracy but original products by downloading an original DVD off torrents.

Let's just say that I'm borrowing the officially copied DVD from someone else off the net that I do not recognise or know of.

I'm not wrong for borrowing an officially copied DVD, right? All I need to do is to get my PowerISO/MagicISO up and running and I'll be able to watch them movies.

:D [ / end of sarcasm ]

Now, as per Starbucks - I might have the finalised store that I'll be transferred to in Penang during my 4 month stint. But the problem is, I'm going to be tendering my resignation on the 1st of November and I'll be officially inactive on the 1st of December.

Problem is, what if my application for an Australian university doesn't get confirmed by February?

Rejoin Starbucks? I have no idea yet. HAHAHAHAHAH.

And as for the guitar - I'm pretty disappointed that I'm not going anywhere. I'm still playing the same old stuff, doing the same old things (and even less from time to time), and I'm still stuck with the same studies. It never ends because there's no boundaries in music, supposingly. Everybody's striving to get better from every aspect or all of the aspects they've already achieved. Just improvements, I guess?

I picked up a couple of videos through YouTube.com. It's the perfect source of inspirations, but hell, I don't know who to look up to and for.

So here's a couple of videos I checked out, literally, just last night:



















What the...??



Also, my recent download of guitar tabs include Toni Braxton's Unbreak My Heart and Paul Gilbert's version of Fly Me To The Moon.

Oh God.

Now you see how fucked up my musical mind is?

But then again, I ain't complaining much because music's just.. awesome.

It's orgasmic!

Let's not forget Jack Johnson as well now, shall we?

Now We're Talking!

G Spot Jam

Tonight was interesting.

It's my first time back in Penang to play on stage. The sort of thing I had in mind a couple of years back. Get instruments, get on stage, and just start playing.

Of course, I wasn't part of the spotlight. Was accompanied by Ying Kit, Kelvyn Yeang, Jonathan Scully and a really cool European bassist.

And jackpot, we did a tribute to..

.. Jimi Hendrix!

Would've been Michael Jackson's tribute if we were a bunch of insane dancers or something.

We played Little Wing and Red House. Truly and interesting experience, but then again, I was out of their league because I lacked of practice and the heart for music.

For the past year, I've been studying nothing but timing, progression, notes, and technique. But when it comes down to the simplest stuff in the world, I went out.

And years ago, I was able to do the simplest stuff in the world.

And that is just to play music.

As easy as it sounded, I couldn't do it.

But until a point, I thought of nothing, and G Spot turned into the house of blues.

There's only one remedy for problems like these: To play more.

Woo boy..

Would like to thank both Kelvyn and Ying Kit for giving me the opportunity to learn from this minor event. Pictures up soon, but I've got none of myself T_T

Greetings!

This is probably my 5th or 6th time trying to get a blog post up from Penang.

Hell, the computer here is shitty, but it performs fast. One fine reason is because my mum jacked it real badly during the absence of my brother and me.

If I brought my laptop home, I wouldn't have bothered with this place.

Anyways, some updates, I'm being a certified ballerina due to the fact I have to perform high classed ballet from one area to another area of the house due to its tight corners and pathways. God. After working in Starbucks for a year, if I were to do the Value Walk, I'd put something like, "There are obstacles obstructing customers on the pathway, from the entrance to the bar area."

Like wtf, man. I've never seen this home any messier.

And I thought my room in KL was messy! Although tight, I'm able to FEEL the grounds and walk on it.

In Penang .. There's no such things! I have to either hop from one side to another, or stomp on my brother's bed to get to mine, and kick a few cupboards and get myself admitted to the hospital right beside me.

Great, huh?

Sheesh.

Anyways, it's raining like hell here in Penang, nonstop. I miss this weather, but being stuck at home with a computer is..good enough. If not, I would've been really bored because my mum took the TV to the new place, and I have no PS2 to at least play around with.

The guitar sounds good perhaps.

Then again, I have other things to do.

I've settled half of what I'm supposed to do, and now I'm going to do major preparations for the big day coming up next Saturday.

Oh well.

Till then.

On a special note: I miss you me yummyness ..

Takin' In The View From The Outside..

Feeling like the underdog..

That's the only rhythm that runs through my head for the moment.

Updates: I pretty much screwed up my finals and a little bit of my work life. But all feels well.

Remember that the keyword is "feels" well.

Anyways, I'm heading home to Penang for the first time in.. 8 months?

It's been long. Even the tickets went up, and I didn't even take note. Great, right? RM 70 for tickets back and forth. I guess this will be the last few times I'll be traveling around or something.

.. OR something ;)

Hehehe.

I'm still considering to take my camera back to Penang to take some shots by the seaside, seeing if I could get some pictures up and running.

Heh.

I'm currently running a monitor check on this laptop seeing if it has any problems. I'm amazed by it because the user had put individual words for characters that looks like Islam-writings or Russian words. I wouldn't know how they would look like, but it's different from our keyboard.

Now the next thing I'm looking forward to; going home to a home that has nobody in it. My parents won't be in Penang, my brother's obviously in Australia wrestling with the Tasmanian Devils.

So I'll be home.

.. Home?

Doesn't feel like it anymore.

And I've only been away for 2 years.

Why?

I'm looking forward to my old friends. Hopefully being able to meet up, that's for sure.

I'm also looking for a second hand phone..

.. Hmmm..

Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Music - is getting a bit out of hand. A little bit too mixed up in many ways. The term "lost" would be perfect to describe it.

Still trying to practice on speed.

How do people go into hyper-speed mode and just seem relaxed with it?

Blah.

JESUS.

LIKE OMFG OK.

Headache.

O4 - HKCU\...\Run: [fpdwai] rundll32.exe "C:\Users\user\AppData\Roaming\gfimbbw.dll,eognqja

Obviously, the rest of the filenames have a different sort of arrangement and file format.

Stupid infected thumbdrives.

Thank goodness I don't keep much information in my laptop or they'd probably be stolen -_-

And I'm tensed.

But.

Hello. You're sleeping soundly.

Problem is, you're not snoring.

=(

I'm worried.

But then again, you're finally sleeping.

Hello.

I miss you.

CIBAI LAH.

KANNINEH PUKI MA CHAO HAI STUPID FUCKING SHITBALLS.

WHO IN THE BLOODY FUCK WORLD WANTS TO FUCKING KNOW ABOUT THE HISTORY OF ACCOUNTING?!

!@&#%^?!@$*!&%!#*%&!%#!&#&!@
^!%&!@$*!&@$#!&@#

LANCIAO LAAAH

Blank.

You won't find it here
Look another way
You won't find it here
So die another day

Andy Who?

At some point, it wasn't up to what some of us were expecting. Was good, but it could have been better.

But anyways, here are some pictures.

Huhuhu..

Bad shots, indeed.

Simplified Mentality.

Whenever you are vocal regarding your opinions and want to ensure that it all goes well, people say that you're a little bit too loud.

So the next time I'm required to assist something important, or an event, you can get my mobile number and shove it right in between of your ass.

If you do not require full corporation, then just say it, retards.

Photographic Updates.

Here's a few things that happened lately.

The reason why I decided to post up some pictures is because I can touchy-touchy a little bit on LightRoom.

I just got home from Pavillion. Got my first top from Heritage 1821 or 1981, or something like that. It's a Forever 21 branch. The designs are somewhat similar to TopMan, which are entirely European, so I wouldn't want to wear such things.

Until I found this:


And at Starbucks? I managed to compile my rewards. The most recent reward I managed to get would be the M.U.G. award - an award where I managed to take at least 256 employee beverages in mugs / tumblers instead of using plastic cups and harming the environment!


Just joking. The M.U.G. award stands for the Moves of Uncommon Greatness award - Something you've performed for the store - regardless to partners or customers - that goes beyond your job scope, in a way. The reason why I got this award would be that I came in for my shift hours before due to a voluntary act without being requested. This happened due to lack of partners on the day.

Then comes the certification of being a Store Coffee Master and an In-Store Learning Coach.



The In-Store Learning Coach is a position where a partner is certified to go through a Barista Training Programme with new partners in coaching them in accordance to Starbucks' standards. It has been a very interesting experience for me as I meet plenty of people with different personality - causing me to have the ability to adapt towards others like working in different stores in a short period of time.


The Store Coffee Master shows a partner (of any sort in Starbucks) having great passion in what they do; regardless if it's doing a Tall Latte, or grinding a 1 pound whole bean French Roast for customers, it's about the passion that you have for the job. Accompanied by a Black Apron, having the ability and knowledge to explain what's what to customers; not correcting what they know, but educating them regarding the coffee culture and how we roast, sell and compare beans against each other.














Next up? Ain't going to be much. What was it again? Andy Timmons? ;)

The Current Must-Pickup!

It's the long-awaited album, Schzzowphrenic, by Schizzow himself.

If you all followed up on the previous Sentimentalities project by Fundamental Mentalities in 2006, I believe you are most familar with the person on the mic most of the time.

Schizzow, I believe, would be the only member in FDM who ventured off in producing his music with help from his buddies.

I have yet to listen and see the final product. My curiousity builds up per day, and I can't wait to get my hands on my own copy!

Bleh.

And I'm happy to say that I got featured on this album twice! :D

Anyways, for more info, click here.

When it ticks, when does it tock?

4 hours. But I've been sitting down for 6 hours.

And I finished one assignment.

Now for the last one.

And I'm looking at my facebook, and my MSN being off. The first time I remembered I would do something like this was 2 years ago.

When I moved to KL, and just studied.

Better concentration.

Accompanied by music.

.. God, does time pass by so quickly.

Time to settle the next assignment before it tocks.

Even if..

If I die tomorrow
I'd be all right
Because I believe
That after we're gone
The spirit carries on

Never Judge A Book By Its Cover.

Fat.

Obese.

Not sexy looking.

Or yummy.

Not a looker.

Who cares. I lead my life as how I like it. And most people are okay with the way I am.

I'm imperfect in so many ways, yet people still accept me for who I am.

The beauty of life is when you feel numb.











What am I now?

I miss you.

Thoughts.

You know that it's true.
(Every time I see your face I miss you baby)
You know that it's you.
(I want to let you know you're driving me crazy.)
I'd do anything to help you to see, I don't think you understand what you're doing to me.
You know that it's true.
(Every now and then I want to call you baby.)
You know that it's you.
(I say a prayer that you'll come back to me lady.)
Oh yeah.
Life ain't anything alone can't you see you're an angel in my eyes,
everyday you're closer to me.

Come What May, Andy Timmons!

Delicious.

You Know It..

.. When a customer compliments that you're quick on the cash-register system in Starbucks.
.. When a customer gets their drinks, change, receipt, and foodstuff right after the printer prints out your order.
.. When a customer sees that you hold quite a bit of knowledge (where the senior partners definitely know more.) and they enjoy sharing it with you.
.. When people sees the passion you have towards your work.
.. When people knows you're particular about a certain procedure being done.

It definitely marks the 1-year milestone in my life. Until today, I can't believe that I'm still holding onto this job consistently without complains (Well, except for a few), and of course, Creating the Starbucks Experience.

I am constantly reminded and tempted to go through my Barista Training Programme to ensure that I am reminded of what they taught me in class to ensure that it is practised everyday.

It's simple.

• When a customer compliments you that you man-handle the POS quickly, it shows that you were put on shift on every weekend - whenever it's busy.
• When a customer also compliements that you work quickly and get their stuff done before s/he could even lay out the exact change, it means that you have proper time management to serve the customer (e.g. reading body language - using CDR.)
• When a customer knows you know your stuff; it shows that you were too used to the store and you read upon the magical resource manuals that nobody bothers to read nowadays.
• When people see that you are passionate towards the things you do. It's more to like, you worship coffee and have a shrine at home.
• When your partners notice that you're particular about procedures, unless if there's a special reason and excuse to break it. Just think about it - Do a customer's beverage like you're doing your own. I'm sure you wouldn't like it when someone else spits into your employee beverage or someone else screws up your beverage whenever you purchased it regardless under discount or at full price, right?

As some of my partners heard regarding my departure from Starbucks Ikano this coming September, I have no idea if I have a proper store to work in,or not.

.. or maybe just slack around, and play the guitar until I'm musically inclined once again..

Heh.







I lap you, Gajah boolat ;)

Mike heal?

For no odd reason, I'm having this bunch of melodies being played in my head. It's the intro to Dream Theater's "Learning to Live".

Where the keyboardist plays one time signature.
Where Mike Portnoy comes in and plays another.
Then John Petrucci takes over what Mike plays,
whereas Mike and John Myung plays another different time signature.

Or another bunch of melodies.

Beauty in its music.

But today, my late post, shall be dedicated to Michael Jackson, the late King of Pop. One of the persons that I highly respect in music due to his adaptability in various genres - and making it big at the same time.

Of course, I must admit that Beat It, Bad, Billie Jean, The Way You Make Me Feel, Remember The Time, made me listen to Michael Jackson.

But then again, I had a good laugh on the day of his death. Simple. The radio stations and news channels who once condemned him of being a pedophile, a non-human being who hung a child over the balcony, and plenty of his other mistakes that jeopardised his career, fame and personality, were mourning over his death.

Way to go, you fuckin' cash cows. Pick on the biggest news, and make it even more enourmous.

I can bet my flat white bottoms if John Petrucci or Steve Vai (Who happens to be everybody's guitar hero) were to pass away one day, all of you would be focusing on plain idiotic jokes about how a boyfriend proposed to his girlfriend, but only later did she know, was an April Fool's joke.

That, was definitely worth a laugh. Later did the boyfriend know that the girlfriend dumped him and that wasn't an April Fool's joke.

Of course I would definitely mourn over Michael Jackson, but for someone to criticise a person, then mourn over his death, is not a true fan of any sort.

Nor does the person has any real respect towards him.

So, it made me sick that most radio stations, like usual, were playing several tributes of his biggest hits to remember the unholiest day in his life.

Of course, respect goes out to those radio stations that randomly played Michael Jackson's songs; only because he was remembered to pull off his dance moves that inspired so many.

Like who? Girls, your oo-lala dance choreographer Wade Robson, of course.

The fact is simple. If you were to fight with your parents, and wait till the day they die, then apologise, it's not going to make a difference because you never know when they'd forgive you. Either when you're still alive, or being successful, or when you're tapping on heaven's door, or when you're in the midst getting kicked out of heaven, taking a huge fall towards hell.

I know I'm going to hell for what I've done. I don't ask for any forgiveness because I know that my mistakes were mine.






RIP Michael Jackson.

[Poem] Prancing Emotions.

Even if the skies were firery red,
The world coming to an end.
The vision we see is the same,
And even if our bodies are distances away.

When I sing for people,
I'd use a mic.
So everybody can hear,
Hoping you'd be there.

And as you sleep,
I'd call upon the angels of the night,
The one that smiles,
Them big, fat, happy, jolly ones.

I'd be staying home, rotting my organs away,
Knowing that you'd be there, one day.
I'll be on wheechairs and in bandages,
You'd be there take me everywhere.

Just because I'm distant,
Doesn't mean I love you less.
Could only mean I'd love you more,
And I wouldn't miss you any less.

Being the man, who's known to be a beast,
Only the purest of hearts could understand.
Only the purest of hearts would love,
Only the purest of hearts would accept.

Even if the words don't come out,
Don't question yourself of what's your way.
More than words is something I can not say.
Saying "I love you" can't mean everything, anyway.

So we dance in the moonlit park,
Hand in hand, we'd prance through the grass.
Like Cinderella and her prince, only without the castle.
But with the heart, and with the love.

iSpeak.

Sometimes, approaching others with open ideas are the worst thing to do.

In fact, there's no such thing as being nice, explaining why something's not in proper order, or being..nice.

Most of the time, you need to get it into their thick skull about what's right and what's wrong; even if you were to use a hammer to crack their skull.

The funniest method would still be sarcasm, not through jokes.

I think some people are just plain idiots.